Bad Dating Stories in Five Lines or Fewer

By Christy Murphy

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” he said, but she couldn’t risk that he didn’t mean it. She closed her eyes, silenced her inner warning bells, and followed him down the hall.

* * * * *

As she rants about her ex-boyfriend’s commitment issues during their coffee date, he can’t help but notice she’s gotten her soy latte “to go.”

* * * * *

Her experiment dating older men seemed to be going well. She found the back seat of his Mercedes kind of classy.

* * * * *

“Don’t roll your eyes at me,” she said to her best friend. “He IS single. It’s just the paperwork on his divorce isn’t finished.”

* * * * *
This time will be different.

* * * * *

She looked at the line of coke on the dresser and hesitated. “I’m worried, I’ll become addicted,” she said.

“Sweetheart,” he purred back with his sexy French accent, “I’ve been doing this for over twenty years, and I haven’t become addicted.”

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